It is just my insanity

"I sigh.I can't recognise myself.I've changed alot and I don't really feel like it.I've lost my whole identity.I know, the world is cruel.But it doesn't mean I am free to fuck myself.I am standing.I watch my hands carefully.I turn them around and back, studying them.No.Things shouldn't have gone so far.I can't believe I left myself get to this.I am standing.My legs are trembling.Tears fall on my cold hands.I take a deep breathe.I can't believe that I kept on being confused.I can't believe that I kept pretending I was the victim all this time.Don't missunderstand me.After all, I am human too.I laugh a bit.Everything changes every other second lived.I am standing.I get my head up.I am watching the sky.It begins to rain.I am turning all around through rain drops.I am caught in my own fairytale.I smile.I fall on my knees.I am crying o happiness.It is for certain now.I have turned insane, but this is all that I have left.In fact, why wouldn't I abuse my insanity? Nobody can or has the right to blame me now."